I was in the middle of cycling through the household laundry when the doorbell rang. I opened the door but didn’t see anybody. I heard a soft *ahem* and looked down. There was a gnome on my doormat.
He was about two feet tall, with the same cherry cheeks and snowy white beard you always see in the pictures. But he wore drab grey coveralls with lettering at the pocket reading MUNICIPAL MAGIC WORKS, had heavy workboots on his feet, and his pointed hat was yellow and flared out at the bottom; it took me awhile to realize it was a high conical hardhat.
The gnome handed me a grimy sheaf of papers. “Hey, uh, sorry to disturb you, mac,” he said, “but I got some work orders here.”
“Okay,” I said. “What does this have to do with me?”
“Well, some of your neighbors have been complaining lately about a poor flow of magical energy in this here general area,” the gnome explained. “You know, spells fizzing out, frogs turning into half-frog-half-prince, that sort of thing.”
“Sorry to hear about that,” I said.
“Yeah. Well, anyway, we got a ley line running through your backyard, so’s we’re going to have to dig it up and inspect it.”
Dig up my yard? “Uh, nope, I don’t think you’re going to do that.”
“Sorry, mac, but we gotta do it, and you gotta let us,” the gnome apologized. “We’re in the easement.”
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He was about two feet tall, with the same cherry cheeks and snowy white beard you always see in the pictures. But he wore drab grey coveralls with lettering at the pocket reading MUNICIPAL MAGIC WORKS, had heavy workboots on his feet, and his pointed hat was yellow and flared out at the bottom; it took me awhile to realize it was a high conical hardhat.
The gnome handed me a grimy sheaf of papers. “Hey, uh, sorry to disturb you, mac,” he said, “but I got some work orders here.”
“Okay,” I said. “What does this have to do with me?”
“Well, some of your neighbors have been complaining lately about a poor flow of magical energy in this here general area,” the gnome explained. “You know, spells fizzing out, frogs turning into half-frog-half-prince, that sort of thing.”
“Sorry to hear about that,” I said.
“Yeah. Well, anyway, we got a ley line running through your backyard, so’s we’re going to have to dig it up and inspect it.”
Dig up my yard? “Uh, nope, I don’t think you’re going to do that.”
“Sorry, mac, but we gotta do it, and you gotta let us,” the gnome apologized. “We’re in the easement.”
( Read more... )