Dobson

(With apologies to Tom Lehrer)

The wackiest boy in the US
Was Dobson; the sickest as well
'Cause his actions with Family Focus
Reduced his poor soul to a shell

His prayers contained a small mention
Which his followers echoed with glee
That the poor Democratic Convention
Would drown like a rat in the sea

Dobson, tell us!
All thaumaturges are jealous!
Which of your mystical tripe
Got you Gustav and Hanna and Ike?

They prayed and they chanted and blessed so
Then waited for heavenly drama
But then all that long day at INVESCO
The sun beamed down on Obama

Yet all of their prayers frenetic
Were heard, but not wholely approved of
For then, here cometh justice poetic:
The Carib Sea gave us Gustav!

Dobson, tell us!
Witchdoctors worldwide are jealous!
Is this what karma is like
Getting Gustav and Hanna and Ike?

Gustav bore down as the GOP
Attempted to put on their own show
What a scandalous tidbit of irony
After bungling Katrina so!

They waffled and wept and rent garments
While Gustav soaked Louisiana
But then just at the death of the varmint
Along came a girl named Hanna!

Dobson, tell us!
All quacks and wizards are jealous!
Being the foot-in-mouth type
Got you Gustav and Hanna and Ike

Now strategy wonks are a-flustered
Regarding the red state convention
'Cause it's hard to keep media mustered
When Ike has voters' attention

I certainly hope Dobson's lesson
May pass down to those we elect-a:
In political talk please don't be messin'
With the hurricane trifecta!

Dobson, tell us!
Why must you be overzealous?
Running your yap on the mic
Got you Gustav and Hanna
(and lots of laughs, bwana)
For Gustav and Hanna and Ike!